Author: Victoria

I am a wife, grandmother, published author and musician.
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Am I Enough?

Photo and quote By: Lindsey Ellen Simon
This is one of my favorite views…surrounded by towering trees.
It’s here where it gets quiet enough for the silent things to be heard and slows down enough for the hidden things to be seen. Where you can actually hear yourself breathe in life and feel every time your heart beats. Can these things be seen and felt other places? Sure…but the difficulty increases as the height of the trees decrease.

Do I really believe that I am enough?

I just returned home from an hour and a half massage! It was absolutely fabulous and absolutely needed. My massage therapist is a close friend and professional who is as genuinely concerned about my well-being as I am. She is so important to me that she gained honorable mention in my first book that was written during my own process of finding wholeness. I first had to define the term before I could pursue it! Below is the definition copied from the December 17, 2020 blog entitled “Wholeness”.

It is also a direct quote from the first page of “Escape from Darkness”.

Wholeness is the sense that my life is One – not many parts or many compartments, but one loving, breathing, ordered life. In the midst of the search for wholeness – two good things remain; my desire to be whole and the voice that can lead me to wholeness.

Wholeness allows me to embrace who I am and at the same time strive to achieve all I am capable of achieving and become all I am capable of becoming. Being content with who I am today and improving myself for tomorrow.

I believe wholeness is attained when we find the delicate balance that allows both to coexist.

Massage was a major player in my pursuit of emotional freedom. Yet it is only one of many things a person can do to rejuvenate a tired body or mind. It only takes a bit of thought and intentional effort to make moments of self-care happen for yourself. I personally love any kind of pampering. If there was a job entitled “receiver of professional self-care” I would certainly qualify. I have several ideas! It seems I frequent conversations including self-care more and more in these days of uncertainty, isolation, and information overload. It also seems there is a common theme that often relates to “unworthiness” in those dialogues.

Many women really do have difficulty seeing themselves as worthy of putting their own self-care in the budget. I believe most women are wired to BE the nurturer or giver instead of the receiver of such love. Things like massage therapy can be seen as fluffy and unneeded. However, if medicine is needed for well-being or illness, we quickly fork out the cash.

The question I raise today deserves introspection. How can we see ourselves as ENOUGH to feel worthy of “self-care” in this chaotic world of high demands and constant stress? I wish there were a clear fix-all answer. Somebody would be rich, wouldn’t they?

The answer is not quick and it certainly isn’t a FIX ALL remedy. The first step is a simple decision to pursue your own wholeness. The rest of the steps happen naturally as the progress is walked out. You may be led to a counselor, life coach, or mentor. You may find yourself on an extended vacation in the mountains. You may engage in totally new and improved daily routines that include walks, quiet time, writing, or cooking. Whatever brings your mind to the center of relaxation allowing your whole body to be involved is worthy of being put on the list.

I found a new person hidden under the rubble of stress and trauma once I dedicated time to run my race to wholeness. The first few steps were nothing more than tiny steps of faith because I had never seen myself as enough. Smart enough. Talented enough. Pretty enough. Worthy enough. My perspective has changed as time and discipline have ran their course. YES– I will schedule a monthly massage. YES – I will spend an hour each morning with a book or pen and paper. YES – I will protect myself from hitting the emotional ditch. I walk toward my dreams but with total awareness that it is a JOURNEY and NOT A SPRINT!

I leave you with this encouragement. Find that secret place like you see in the picture at the beginning of this blog where you can actually hear yourself think. Ask yourself “Do I believe I am enough? “ Your answer will lend a good starting place to begin a new self care routine. Practice saying YES to yourself. We all have room to expand and by all means

Enjoy the Journey- VB

Find more of Lindsey Ellen Simon’s pics on Instagram

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Life is a Vapor

Life is a vapor. It is here for only a short time just like the cloud that rests on this water.

Life is short….we say it frequently in casual conversation. We use the phrase like we truly understand the depth of its truth. I believe we all reach a place in our lives at one time or another where we wish we could lasso time and dole it out in smaller increments. You know, slow this train down a bit. Time doesn’t stand around and wait on us to find the courage to begin doing the desires of our heart. The sun still rises and sets every single day and what we do in between is the life we create.

Deep thinking but not profound revelation. It is a very simple concept. The responsibility of how we sculpture our lives lands solely on each one of us as individuals at the end of each day. The truth is life really is a tiny mist of vapor. I love how the Passion Translation of the bible states it :

James 4:14 But you don’t have a clue what tomorrow may bring. For your fleeting life is but a warm breath of air that is visible in the cold only for a moment and then vanishes!

It doesn’t take long to get motivated if you let those words penetrate your soul. The definition of the word fleeting does it for me. It means a short time or passing quickly. I am sure you get my point. SO where and how do we find the courage to consider these “fleeting” lives a true piece of art? A canvas that hasn’t been completely painted? A book that has the best chapters yet to come? A song with lyrics that one can’t get out of their head after they hear it?

Facebook is great at posting those videos that give glimpses of how we recorded our last few years. The memories remind me of the value of time already spent. Did I live in such a way that another could gain a leg up of encouragement when the going gets rough? Could one glean a ray of hope to keep putting one foot in front of the other by the way I have chosen to use my fleeting moment?

Here’s the deal. No one can do it for us. WE HAVE TO CREATE THE SPACE TO BECOME WHO WE ARE INTENDED TO BE ON THIS EARTH. For example, Thursday’s have become my favorite day. It has taken me several years to strategically create an entire day to designate as my own day to challenge my creative genes. I finally have a voice to say to the world “THIS IS MY DAY!” The seasons of raising children and full time work have now been completed. The entrepreneurial spirit within me has worked hard to build an income and be my own boss. There is nothing that can lend more freedom than being in control of your own time. There is also nothing that can be more challenging than learning to steward that time for its most productive potential. The learning curve is like a roller coaster with huge lows in the dips and big highs on the mountaintops. I certainly have not always stayed steady on the course but keeping a forward focus has been a key player in creating that space.

You see, when you begin to “LOOK” at that constant knocking of creativity in your heart, something magical happens. It unveils itself and begins to take up residence in your soul. The more you look at it the more it grows. A dream will respond much like a plant that flourishes under a gardeners nurturing hand. It’s very important the words spoken over a desire are positive because they are like food to its roots.

I leave you with these words of encouragement. Open the door to that constant knock of desire in your soul. Look through the peephole at the very least to see the grand thing waiting to enter into your life. Take a good “LOOK” at it! Everyone has something and it’s never too late to breathe it into existence. Furthermore, understand that EVERY day should be pointed toward a purpose because this is YOUR vapor. Make it count! Lives lived with intention are full of joy, peace, and fulfillment. They make it possible for us to

ENJOY THE JOURNEY – VB

PS….Dan Miller continues to have a large impact on my journey. Listen to some of his podcasts and explore the website!

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What are your DREAMS?

One of the hardest questions ever presented to me was “What are your dreams?”. I remember the feeling like it was yesterday. It seemed like the words had rolled off this person’s tongue in slow motion and came hurling at me one letter at a time. I quickly realized that I really didn’t have a dream. The only thing I knew was hard work and survival. Who knew there was a future with endless possibilities? Who knew life truly is what YOU make it? Who knew there was permission granted to develop the art behind the dream?

His name is Philippe Petit. I mention him today because his story both inspires and challenges me. I love people who make us think larger while presenting the opportunity to go beyond the normalcy of life and do something different. His story will certainly intrigue you, but it may also stir up an inner desire that is lying underneath a heap of excuses. You know, like all the reasons “WHY” your dream cannot come true!

The same amount of time is available to all of us. None of us get special privileges in the realm of time. Some folks reach their dreams quickly while others take them to their graves. Some folks with shortened lifetimes accomplish more than others who live several decades. What is the difference between these people?

Philippe’s movie The Walk portrays his determination to simply do what he was born to do. He didn’t take any detours. He called his desire his “ART”. It looked ridiculous to everyone around him but he endured the loneliness of rejection and unwanted opinions and stayed the course. He simply didn’t settle for the mundane of what the world had labeled “NORMAL”. At the age of 24 he completed his dream and became a famous artist of his skill. He stood high above a world that applauds his efforts to this day.

When a person dares to pursue a dream it inevitably begins to get others involved. A dream rolling with momentum is hard not to watch! It becomes attractive to those who are called to be noticed! There may be a season of loneliness and feeling misunderstood BUT suddenly one will find themselves with new friends of support and love. Philippe called those who assisted him in his dream “accomplices” to his art.

I leave you with these words of encouragement.

Ask your self “What is the art within me?” Pull your dream from beneath the heap of negative words and place it on the canvas of your life. Be a flicker of light in a world of darkness. I believe you will stand in awe as your tiny light transforms into an inferno of inspiration and hope. Keep me updated because I would love to be an “accomplice” to your art that has not yet been seen!

ENJOY THE JOURNEY- VB

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LOOKING FOR TRUTH

Happy New Year folks! In today’s chaotic atmosphere several are looking for TRUTH while frantically sorting through the plethora of daily information that is freely available at our fingertips. The real truth is “we cannot believe most of what we hear” these days. The escalation of deceit is happening faster than anyone could possibly keep up with it. Even the deceivers are having difficulty!

The New Year always brings a bit of reflection for me. It only takes a quick look over my shoulder to remind me that looking at the past is a good way to steer off course. However, I do believe that sometimes a quick look can also be a reminder of a few hard-earned nuggets of wisdom that are worthy of tucking in our backpack for the journey ahead.

This year my personal look back helped me understand some things about TRUTH. My dad was an ornery soul, to say the least, BUT one thing he stood firm on was telling the truth. He instilled the valuable virtue with the back of his hand if needed. I didn’t agree with his method for memory but the foundation of TRUTH has been extremely helpful in the big picture of life. I recall only a few times I strayed from the truth and they both brought consequences with deep scars to myself and others.

Have you ever been around a person who is so comfortable in their own skin that you fight the feeling of jealousy? I try to make those people my friends! Being close to them allows me to pull from their positive influence.

It seems things become true when proven. Those things that have proved themselves over time have become part of my infrastructure known as the belief system. Unfortunately, a lie will position itself as the impostor of the truth When a person with a traumatic past looks in the mirror – their belief system tells them what they see. What they see drives the rest of their day. Likewise, when a person with the real truth of their own identity looks in the mirror – what they see also drives the rest of their day. One sees through the lens of fear and insecurity while the other sees through a much clearer lens of confidence and love. The good news is infrastructures can be remodeled! It only takes courage and an open mind to start the demolition.

It is probably safe to say that most of us have been both of those people at one time or another. It is common to even have a foot in both the path of trauma and the path of true identity on our journey to wholeness. There are days I still remind myself of the truth. The TRUTH that says I am beautifully and wonderfully made. The truth says there are places on this earth that await my influence. The truth that says PERFECTION is an unreasonable goal. The truth that says FAILURE is simply a strength exercise and adds to the lessons of wisdom. The truth says I must love myself before I can fully love others.

I leave you with this encouragement. Examine your belief system. Make the needed changes if there are gaps or areas of deceit supporting the infrastructure. Do not wait another minute to wipe the fog from your daily lens of perspective. We are living in a day where the virtue of truth is far and few between. There will only be a remnant who chooses to stand on the side of integrity, love, and truth. Do not be deceived into thinking the course of violence and lies will lead to a place of safety. Take the road less traveled and become a person with influence to change the places where you are given a voice.

AND BY ALL MEANS

ENJOY THE JOURNEY – VB

One more thing for the record: My dad was right – the truth is always the best route. 🙂

Check out my recent book on Amazon. The title of it is Escape from Darkness.

I chronicled my own journey to the truth.

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Collect Perfect Moments

So here we are! The very end of the weirdest year ever! Or is it?

It is true that conditions have been different and challenging. It hasn’t all been good but it certainly hasn’t all been bad. I know several folks who have had a most successful year. Some folks used the isolation from society as an opportunity to introspect and find those crevices within that could use some personal development. Others STARTED new businesses in the middle of a global shutdown! Some folks have endured extreme heartache and difficulty. Some have had to face unbelievable health challenges and even death all alone. A huge segment of people stayed glued to the news and let “the numbers” become a part of daily living. Then there are the heroes of healthcare and transportation who worked endless and grueling hours. Emotion builds in my heart as I write that sentence. They really are heroes. I give them honor today for the courage, bravery and stamina it takes to be on the front line.

Most of us have been forced to change the way we do things but can we “really” pin it as the weirdest year ever? I confront us with this question only to encourage a new mindset.

The picture you see above is a gift from a very good friend who had a memento made using one of my daily practices. I have collected “Perfect Moments” for years. I promise when you start actively seeking a perfect moment, it will not fail to show up. Let me assure you that a perfect moment is not the same as an extravagant moment. Extravagant moments are well commended but not near as frequent. A perfect moment is quite simple. It is that first sip of morning coffee, a lyric in a song that grabs your attention, a baby’s laugh, a breath of fresh air after (or during) a rain, the sound of thunder, a phone call from your child, a text from a friend, a pet that meets you at the door, etc. The list can go on and on!The point is when you become a constant seeker for a perfect moment – a positive mindset begins to shift your future into a different lane. A lane of peace and joy and ultimately – opportunity. Your days have more sunshine and your nights have more dreams! I know it sounds too simple and a bit quirky but that is pretty much me in a nutshell – quirky enough to pull the gold out of otherwise dismal circumstances and simple enough to let go of the things I cannot control anyway.

We are closing 2020 and opening 2021. A new year gives us the opportunity to set new goals and even restore hope where hope has been lost. However, don’t get locked into the numbers that fill the boxes on the thing called the calendar. It may help organize our lives and manage the time between sunrise and sunset BUT time will pass anyway no matter how we fill our days. Time will and can heal those places in the heart with open wounds of the past or present.

I agree with Linda Ellis who wrote “The Dash Poem”

I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend. He referred to the dates on the tombstone from the beginning… to the end.

He noted that first came the date of birth and spoke of the following date with tears, but he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time they spent alive on earth and now only those who loved them know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own, the cars… the house… the cash. What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.

So think about this long and hard; are there things you’d like to change? For you never know how much time is left that still can be rearranged.

To be less quick to anger and show appreciation more and love the people in our lives like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile… remembering that this special dash might only last a little while.

So when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash, would you be proud of the things they say about how you lived your dash?

I leave you with this encouragement my friends. Peer into the hidden corners of each day and collect some perfect moments. Let them saturate the memories in your mind so they’re available to retrieve at any time. Keep a journal to help you reflect. When the calendar tells us another year has passed – we may conclude that it really wasn’t as weird as it seemed! Writing this blog has been a “Perfect Moment” for sure. Have a fabulous NEW YEAR and by all means

ENJOY THE JOURNEY – VB

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DOES IT HAVE TO BE DIRTY SANTA?

Does it have to be Dirty Santa
Does it have to be Dirty Santa?

The day had come for the Christmas gathering for a group of women who I cherish deeply. I was to be their hostess. The one responsible for setting a vibe of love and fellowship. I awoke seeking something creative and different that would allow them to go home that evening with a refreshed desire to influence the world around them with the good in their hearts. The question was swirling in my head “Does it have to be “dirty Santa”?

I am that person that has to intentionally be creative in certain areas or I will stay in a traditional ditch of what I already know. Every year we play one of the most popular go-to Christmas party games ever played! Most of us have had at least one opportunity to play the radical gift exchange during an office party, family gathering, or church celebration.

Each person is called by the number they draw from a hat to pick a beautifully wrapped present which was brought in by each guest. IF it’s a cool gift that catches your eye – – no worries – it can be STOLEN from your fellow game participant up to 3 times before its fate to remain with its final owner. That is UNTIL the end of the game when participant number 1 has the right to look over the entire flock and TAKE WHAT THEY WANT leaving you no other option than to TAKE WHAT YOU WANT from someone else. The game can go on and on until everyone is satisfied or “stuck” with what they opened. It’s a difficult game for some simply because not everyone is wired to take from others even when it is intended to be fun-loving. And what if you are the one that brings the gift that isn’t “cool” and no one really wants it! That’s a whole other emotion that may surface unexpectedly.

Don’t get me wrong, I have had a lot of fun over the years congregating with my friends and co-workers AND came home with some pretty good stuff. I admit I have even bought gifts that I secretly wanted for myself which conveniently allowed me to enter the game with the mindset of creating a strategic plan on the fly to take my own purchase home with me instead of creating a spirit of giving!

It’s comical and a bit sad to actually put the play by play into words. In a season of traditional giving we somehow create just the opposite in an effort to entertain each other. Human nature is pretty good on it’s own being selfish and greedy without purposely giving it an arena to run. Furthermore, it seems to me that 2020 has proposed enough challenges to invoke selfishness and greed.

Anyway, while getting myself ready for the day I hear these words “flip dirty Santa on its head”! I thought, WHAT A FABULOUS IDEA! Which immediately brought up the next question – Just how does one turn a dirty Santa upside down ? I knew the answer by the time the guests arrived. Instead of creating an atmosphere of coveting and stealing, we were going to GIVE, RECEIVE, COMPLIMENT, and BLESS each other! Those practices should be woven in the fabric of our character and visible every day in each of our lives. However, the world doesn’t offer much influence on the matter. Outside of our homes we have to make a conscious effort to stay in such a positive mindset because more often than not someone or some circumstance will present the opportunity to bring out the ugly in us. (and none of us are exempt from a little bit of ugly) .

We drew our numbers to pick a gift BUT the rule was you had to give that gift away. Both the giver and the receiver stood in front of the group while the receiver unwrapped her new gift. The giver then filled in blanks on these three simple statements as she released the giving spirit into the room:

  1. I am giving you this gift because _________________.
  2. My favorite thing about you is ___________________.
  3. I bless you with_______________________________.

OH MY GOSH! There were tears, there was laughter, and there were hugs. We had successfully explored territory outside of our own comfort zones. DIRTY SANTA HAD BEEN FLIPPED ON ITS HEAD!

I could write a very lengthy piece on what all happened that day but I think you get my point.

I leave you with this encouragement:

Take those three statements into the highways and byways. Speak blessings into a world of hurt and greed. Give the gift of the kindness and good that is already cultivating in your heart. Watch it grow as you exercise it with intentional effort. Lets massively come together and flip dirty Santa on its head.

Merry Christmas my friends. Embrace the love around you and by all means

ENJOY THE JOURNEY – VB

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Pursue WHOLENESS

In today’s culture it is of the utmost importance to intentionally pursue wholeness.

We are in full swing of holiday activities, political unrest, and pandemic instructions. Things couldn’t be more exciting or more uncertain. The media offers stress with just one click on your electronic device. One click usually leads to two clicks and before you know it you have been successfully submersed in 30 minutes of information overload. Information for circumstances that you have absolutely no control. Yet the rest of the day you will be left pondering the information. Furthermore, nearly every person in your path will mention their own stress and opinions on the matters within a few seconds of a casual conversation.

Without even knowing it we build internal stress structures. Over time the accumulation of stress causes our bodies to remain in constant fight or flight mode. These days it doesn’t take long to get there. A common phrase is “if there could only be another me, maybe I could complete everything on the daily “to-do” list”.

Well, it isn’t uncommon to find yourself divided into many parts. Parts that represent your past, your present and your future. If you really slow down enough to thoughtfully examine your own behaviors, stress levels, and daily routines, you may find that there REALLY ARE several versions of you accommodating each day! It is no wonder we long to get away in front of the television with our favorite show or consume the drinks, food or medication that calm the internal beast.

I believe women are worse then men regarding the many identities we try to hold up. Especially in the current culture of singleness and singleness with children to raise. In general it seems that men are better at staying to the course of their purpose. Women are wired to “save the world”. We are naturally doers and nurturers.

While I love the empathetic, compassionate and loving part of myself – there came a time that I hit the wall (so to speak). I was running so fast and wearing so many hats, I seldom stopped to make sure I was still breathing.

Let me tell you from personal experience – when your body and mind can’t run anymore, they will stop! Right there in your current tracks you will find yourself unable to function. I can honestly say I have never been more afraid than I was when the overload happened. I could not get control of my emotions. They were running on their own. (story is here) Physical exhaustion was beyond getting out of bed.

Some people hit a wall of anxiety and racing thoughts. I had thoughts of “nothingness” . I wanted to slip into a cave and sleep the world away. It can be very hard to crawl out of such a pit of despair. The mental and physical load on the journey to wholeness is overbearing. Becoming whole is the best and the more difficult of our two options at that point in time. We either succumb to wholeness or fall down the pit of depression. My decision and commitment to pursue wellness came when my counselor asked me to define wholeness.

One of my favorite authors is Matthew Kelly. I found my destination to pursue in his book “RESISTING HAPPINESS” .

WHOLENESS

The sense that my life is One – not many parts or many compartments, but one loving, breathing, ordered life. In the midst of the search for wholeness – two good things remain; my desire to be whole and the voice that can lead me to wholeness.

Wholeness allows me to embrace who I am and at the same time strive to achieve all I am capable of achieving and become all I am capable of becoming. Being content with who I am today and improving myself for tomorrow.

I believe wholeness is attained when we find the delicate balance that allows both to coexist.

I leave you with this word of encouragement. Don’t wait for your own “hit the wall” experience. Begin to listen to the “voice” of Wisdom that resides outside of the wilderness. Start stepping toward your own definition of wholeness and pull the fragments of yourself together. You are important! Wrap this year up in a huge present of time and attention to yourself. Pursue wholeness and by all means

ENJOY THE JOURNEY – VB

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THE FAMILY GATHERING

The Family Gathering

Thanksgiving and Christmas are quickly approaching along with the dilemmas and excitement of the family gathering. There is certainly a pile of other issues to occupy our minds from a national and global level. However, the family gathering scales it back to the tiny spaces we occupy in our homes. The expectation of the troops coming home for the holiday can bring excitement as well as apprehension. It just depends on who you are and what is trending in your family dynamics.

I recently heard a podcast that addressed the topic of properly “expressing our emotions”.

I found it most interesting because many of us don’t know HOW to properly express emotions. I was over 50 years old before I figured out that I had never been taught to express feelings. We simply learn to function in the environments in which we are born.

Some folks are very emotionally healthy if they have been fortunate enough to be in a family that has overcome their own obstacles of dysfunction. I was not that person so it took intentional effort on my part to make it happen. I am sure glad I made that decision because ultimately it will break a weak link of bad behavior in the generations to come. Furthermore, prayerfully it will also make for more pleasant holidays in the future!

Although my intentions and expectations have been positive, our family has not been exempt from stress-charged atmospheres when we have come together through the years. My own emotional healing has recently helped diffuse some situations and open my heart to understanding others a bit better.

You see, suppressing our own emotions leaves us with another rock stacked on the existing pile of debris labeled “unworthiness”. I sat under that pile of dung for many years. It literally strangled me by the throat when emotions would try to surface. I did not know how to express them whether they were good or bad. This had positioned me in a “victim mentality “ when others would appropriately or inappropriately express their feelings.

I truly believed everything was my fault when chaos broke out. As a child, the condemnation manifested itself as fear. Adulthood brought a belief system that had been so altered by fear that my emotional behaviors were very shallow. My walls of protection had been strategically built around my internal emotional structure to a point that I was in my own self-made prison.

I remember the day my counselor made the suggestion of living without my well-built wall of protection. Initially, the idea seemed absurd. Something I could not even imagine. I eventually succumbed to the idea and I broke out of that prison.

I leave you with this word of encouragement. If you can relate to this part of my story, choose this time of the year to make the decision to break down the prison walls. The one thing I can tell you for sure is YOU may be the CHANGE your family has long-awaited. The dynamics change when you begin to model something different.

Most importantly – you will not store the toxic sludge of suppressed emotions. You will politely exchange the false burdens of someone else’s bad behavior to maintain your internal peace. Your load will be lighter and you will be able to focus on the main thing. THE FAMILY GATHERING! We are in uncertain days. We must

ENJOY THE JOURNEY – VB

(read the whole story)

Escape from Darkness Bookcover looking out of the dark forest into the light
Escape from Darkness

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Are You a World Changer? “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. ~Ghandi~

The growth of the scattered poisonous seeds of trauma from childhood were used to create the first layer of the foundation of fear. Fear had pinned me behind the walls it had built on that foundation so early in life that I grew into adulthood believing there was nothing more to life than what I had already seen. I believe most folks never look over the walls. It is why there are only a few who have walked this earth with such a strong influence that they left an impact for hundreds and even thousands of years later. They were the handful of those willing to throw themselves at destiny. They would not let their past experiences become their identity or let fear of failure stop them. Fear is only powerful if we succumb to it.

Fear is relentless; it does not grow weary. Fear is strengthened by layers of insecurity, unworthiness, rejection, failure, and more. The walls built on the foundation of my belief system were so high, I did not know my own potential was confined within the limits of their boundaries. I thought I was living the best life possible. I did not know I was dragging old stuff from the past around with me everywhere I went.

This is an excerpt from my own memoir “Escape from Darkness”. It seemed to appropriately sum up my thoughts as I watched a short clip of recent national news. What in the world is happening? Right or wrong, people will fight for what they believe. They will even go beyond the limits of the law to make a point. Sadly, they may even work from inside the law to fight for what they believe. However, at the end of the day – we all put our shoes on the same way. We all share the commonalities of our own personal vulnerabilities of our past. Our belief systems were formed by our environments and it is what we know…unless we dare to venture out and truly search for what we don’t know.

I have several earthquake instances of awakening in my journey which I now lovingly refer to as “aha” moments. My willingness to explore the perspectives outside of my own prison of deceit opened up a whole new world that brought many opportunities with it. I may have never bumped into those opportunities or new relationships had I not been willing to explore some uncharted territory. My point is this: Ultimately, FEAR is at the root of the erratic behavior we watch on the news, see in our hometowns, and even in our own homes. Fear of the unknown and certainly fear of that which we cannot control. Fear truly is relentless and will push us beyond strength we have never even considered of ourselves.

SO the question is do we annihilate fear, learn to live with it or turn it into a driving force for the good of mankind? I believe the answer is YES to all three of these suggestions. Fear that draws its strength from our past does have to be annihilated through us facing it head on and hitting it right between the eyes with truth. We will always live with a certain element of fear because the more brave and courageous we get the more we will expand our territory of new things. We will continually face giants of resistance with each new endeavor who would like nothing more than to keep us from fulfilling purpose. Finally, when we learn we are actually much more powerful than fear – we can turn it into a positive force in our lives and use it to help our fellow man. Now that I am no longer haunted by the fear that confines and makes me afraid but instead strengthened with courage and curiosity by the fear of entering into unknown fields that hold hidden treasures of opportunity, I am able to change the landscape of my own community with gifts and talents I didn’t even know existed.

I leave you with this encouragement. Don’t be threatened by your past failures, rejections, beliefs, or insecurities. Let them be a stepping stone to your true self. Become a driving force for the good of mankind! It only takes one view of the current news to bring inspiration to present the world with a new way of thinking.

Gandhi said it this way: “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him…J Have a fabulous week my friends and by all means

Enjoy the Journey – VB

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Time Will Not Delay

My office floods with early morning sunlight when the time “falls back” for the Autumn/Winter season. I lift the window just enough to feel a slight breeze and hear the morning song of the birds as it travels across the trees. The trees are now letting go of their leaves that once thrived during the summer season. It speaks to me, time will not delay.

Our lives move through these same seasons. There are days where the sun shines brightly yet seems to set quickly. There are days where darkness looms as it will never end. There are days of extreme light when joy is abundant and we celebrate victories.

I write a lot about time because it is the most valuable commodity in our lives. This little excerpt says it well: The concept of time is elusive because, well, it stands still for no man. It is the life currency that you can never regain after “spending” it. https://simplyshredded.com/the-currency-of-time-lifes-most-precious-commodity.html

I can feel the winds of change as surely as I feel the breeze moving through this room. It reminds me of the importance of “holding things loosely”.

I received the news a year ago in July that one of my best friends of 20 years had been killed in a car accident. I had just seen her a few weeks before as she was getting in her car to leave my house. She waved goodbye, flashed her beautiful smile, and blew me a kiss. She was one of the most talented vocalists I have ever heard in my life. We had plans to do her first recording in our studio the following August. How do we even consider holding these relationships loosely? Yet we must also hold the regrets of the past even more loosely. Neither of them is to be held as ours.

Her life and her early exit from this earth only made me question the element of time even more deeply. We did delay but time did not. We delayed in simply putting that date on the calendar to archive a voice that many of us now long to hear just once more. In the 20 years, she and I spent as friends and music partners – we could not find one recording of her to play at her funeral. Emotions sit right on the surface as I write this because the importance of the message burns with passion in my heart. Her death caused a paradigm shift in the atmosphere of my world. I HAD to move with the shift even though my heart wanted to sit down and find all the seemingly good reasons to quit.

The momentum of the world we live in today is like a raging river. It is fast and furious yet slow and attentive. How do we manage to catch the wave that catapults us to the changes we desire and sit on the beach and breathe in every single moment at the same time? Where is that perfect balance? Is it even possible? I look at the aging of my own body and retrace the footsteps of my life and think “oh how quickly things move.” Events like the death of a loved one can shake your world and bring up many questions. Questions that are worthy of an answer.

We must find resolve in our hearts to bring us to the point of stepping out on the limb of courage to face our fears and annihilate our own procrastination. Just do it even if you’re scared. Even if it’s not perfect. Death will be the final seed we are allowed to contribute but life offers a beautiful window of time. The seeds we have planted on our journey will someday be watered by other sojourners walking their road of destiny. May we learn to plant those seeds, enjoy the growth they give us, and walk on toward those things that await our arrival.

While my friend’s voice was put to rest that day, her daughter stepped into her mother’s legacy and blessed us all with a song. My friend didn’t get to do all that we had planned for her but nonetheless, those seeds from her gift are firmly planted on this earth and will grow no matter what. Just imagine what we can do by simply being a little more intentional with our time.

I leave you with this encouragement. Don’t let time slip away. Get up and look at the sunrise and announce to the world that YOU WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE today and every day hereafter. Hold loosely to those things which will inevitably change as time goes on. Love deeply and on purpose. Move with the changes in your life. Finally, make this holiday season so great that those close to you will forever hold it in their memory bank just like I hold the memory of my friend’s final wave, kiss, and unforgettable smile. I am here to tell you- IT IS WORTH IT!

Enjoy the Journey – VB