Am I Enough?

Do I really believe that I am enough?

I just returned home from an hour and a half massage! It was absolutely fabulous and absolutely needed. My massage therapist is a close friend and professional who is as genuinely concerned about my well-being as I am. She is so important to me that she gained honorable mention in my first book that was written during my own process of finding wholeness. I first had to define the term before I could pursue it! Below is the definition copied from the December 17, 2020 blog entitled “Wholeness”.

It is also a direct quote from the first page of “Escape from Darkness”.

Wholeness is the sense that my life is One – not many parts or many compartments, but one loving, breathing, ordered life. In the midst of the search for wholeness – two good things remain; my desire to be whole and the voice that can lead me to wholeness.

Wholeness allows me to embrace who I am and at the same time strive to achieve all I am capable of achieving and become all I am capable of becoming. Being content with who I am today and improving myself for tomorrow.

I believe wholeness is attained when we find the delicate balance that allows both to coexist.

Massage was a major player in my pursuit of emotional freedom. Yet it is only one of many things a person can do to rejuvenate a tired body or mind. It only takes a bit of thought and intentional effort to make moments of self-care happen for yourself. I personally love any kind of pampering. If there was a job entitled “receiver of professional self-care” I would certainly qualify. I have several ideas! It seems I frequent conversations including self-care more and more in these days of uncertainty, isolation, and information overload. It also seems there is a common theme that often relates to “unworthiness” in those dialogues.

Many women really do have difficulty seeing themselves as worthy of putting their own self-care in the budget. I believe most women are wired to BE the nurturer or giver instead of the receiver of such love. Things like massage therapy can be seen as fluffy and unneeded. However, if medicine is needed for well-being or illness, we quickly fork out the cash.

The question I raise today deserves introspection. How can we see ourselves as ENOUGH to feel worthy of “self-care” in this chaotic world of high demands and constant stress? I wish there were a clear fix-all answer. Somebody would be rich, wouldn’t they?

The answer is not quick and it certainly isn’t a FIX ALL remedy. The first step is a simple decision to pursue your own wholeness. The rest of the steps happen naturally as the progress is walked out. You may be led to a counselor, life coach, or mentor. You may find yourself on an extended vacation in the mountains. You may engage in totally new and improved daily routines that include walks, quiet time, writing, or cooking. Whatever brings your mind to the center of relaxation allowing your whole body to be involved is worthy of being put on the list.

I found a new person hidden under the rubble of stress and trauma once I dedicated time to run my race to wholeness. The first few steps were nothing more than tiny steps of faith because I had never seen myself as enough. Smart enough. Talented enough. Pretty enough. Worthy enough. My perspective has changed as time and discipline have ran their course. YES– I will schedule a monthly massage. YES – I will spend an hour each morning with a book or pen and paper. YES – I will protect myself from hitting the emotional ditch. I walk toward my dreams but with total awareness that it is a JOURNEY and NOT A SPRINT!

I leave you with this encouragement. Find that secret place like you see in the picture at the beginning of this blog where you can actually hear yourself think. Ask yourself “Do I believe I am enough? “ Your answer will lend a good starting place to begin a new self care routine. Practice saying YES to yourself. We all have room to expand and by all means

Enjoy the Journey- VB

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